#179: Perimenopause: Stop Dreading, Start Thriving Through Life’s Next Chapter!

 In this episode, we’re reframing how we think about perimenopause. Instead of dreading it, learn how to prepare, thrive, and see it as a fresh beginning. I shares insights on shifting mindset, navigating symptoms, and taking control with positive strategies to feel your best. I open up about about my journey, highlighting the power of knowledge, support, and lifestyle choices to transform this stage of life 

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Transcript

#179: Perimenopause: Stop Dreading, Start Thriving Through Life’s Next Chapter!

Hello, hello and welcome back to the ITZINU podcast. So today I am wanting to talk about let's not dread menopause. Uh, let's start to prepare for it. So I am dog sitting someone's dog at the moment. So if you hear a a dog barking. It is our little friend's dog. It's not quite used to the noises and that in our house.

And we have a studio at the back of the house and obviously people are coming and going. So every time it hears people, it starts barking. So, uh, if you do hear a dog barking, uh, that is our, our friend's little pup, uh, Luna. So I really want to talk about to, you know, menopause is, Uh, there is so much information out there about it, um, well there is becoming more information about it, but obviously it's something that is, lots of women start to dread it.

And it depends on, everyone's heard, uh, it depends on what your, you know, any female people around you went through themselves. Depends on that's what, what they've probably told you. And lots of women that I know has been told that. You know spoken about very negatively and I really want you to come from to start preparing from it in a way that you can thrive for it and it doesn't have to be the horrible dreaded menopause that everyone sees it as.

I, uh, I was training a client the other day and he said to me When, when should my wife be going through menopause? He's like, I'm dreading it. And I'm already, I'm dreading it already. And, uh, you know, I said to him, she's probably already, you know, he, he was in his fifties, uh, she's in her late forties. I said, she's probably already going through symptoms and, you know, she, maybe you don't even notice and she's already going through stuff.

So, uh, you know, the way that it is spoken about is quite negative. And I really, uh, ask you to reframe. Um, and to start seeing it from a more positive point of view and that you could look at preparing for it. And, uh, and so then you can thrive through the whole menopause process instead of seeing it as a really negative, a really negative thing to go through.

So, uh, you know, lots of people can be quite sad. Uh, they could view it as, uh, you know, instead of viewing it as the end of your reproductive years, uh, you could see it as beginning and a birth of a whole new you. Um, some positive things that we could look at by going through menopause is that be the end of your monthly period cycles.

So you will not have to worry about them anymore. A month, a couple of months ago, I went away with my mom and Just as we were going away, I realized I got my period and my mum was like, Oh, thank God. I don't have to worry about that anymore. So that's a feeling that you don't have to worry about those types of things.

Uh, you know, there's obviously no risk of pregnancy. If we are not cycling, we are not going to get pregnant. Um, you know, if you are somebody that has bad menopa um, period symptoms, uh, cramping and all of those things. Well, you know, it looks, uh, most of them should be going. Uh, we can have disappearing hair, so maybe not as much, uh, hair around.

And, uh, you know, we can look to have a new zest on life. So it doesn't have to be the end. It doesn't have to be the horrible thing that it is portrayed at. Now, it's really interesting to understand menopause is actually one day in time. So it's one day. So it is, the menopause is the day that you, uh, your period has, uh, stopped cycling for one year.

Now I know lots of women that get so close to that one year mark and then they get their period back and then their time starts again. So, uh, you know, so menopause is that day. Menopause is only one day, but we all talk about it like this big, uh, dreaded thing. Now perimenopause. Um, is the lead up, is the lead up to, to menopause.

So it is defined as the time period where your body makes a transition to menopause and it can be marked by, uh, your erratic, like fluctuations of your oestrogen. And this could start like 10 years before menopause. So that one day, so the average age and everybody's individual, everybody's different, but the average age is 51.

Um, of to, to be, go through menopause, uh, but symptoms can start 10 years later. Before some people go through it earlier, some people go through it later. So symptoms of menopause can start in your 30s. You know, and, and we're all different. What I'm asking you to be is to start, uh, knowing this. We, we all know that this is a phase that, that we're going to go through.

You know, as a female. It is something we have no control over. It is something, um, you know, that is going to happen to us. But what you do have control over is how you prepare for it and how you handle it. I'm not saying, uh, I know everybody's different. I am not saying that, um, it will be a breeze. I'm not saying that there won't be difficult times or you won't feel crappy, uh, you know, but the more that you can prepare for it.

The more that you can start to understand your body a little bit better, I truly believe that the symptoms won't be as bad as what they are perceived by everybody else. And there is also lots, there is more research out there and there is more help, um, out there. It is, it is quite an under researched area.

So, um, until the generation, my, my mum's generation, so my mum's in her late 60s. So, uh, her generation is the first generation to actually exercise, uh, and, and it's just start is to exercise through, uh, and after perimenopause. So more research is coming out about the benefits of that and how Um, it was a really, you know, if you look up, uh, pregnancy or any of those things, there is so much research and papers and all of that on how to look after the mom and the baby and everything else.

But if you look up perimenopause or perimenopause, any of those things, there is not much, uh, research. And, and when you go to your GP, you might find, um, That it's a very, that you just get very blanket answers and, uh, it can be very, very frustrating. And I'll give you a view of, of a bit of my journey. Now I'm 41.

So, uh, I am not in menopause. I still have a regular cycle, but I probably did notice a few years ago, I started to notice that I had put on weight. I'd put on weight and, you know, no matter what things I kind of did understanding my weight around my abdomen. So, you know, so I went to my GP saying could I be starting perimenopause?

I want to be getting on top of this before this happens, before I hit menopause. I want to get on top of this. You know, can you check? And I was kind of just dismissed. I was kind of dismissed. No, you're cycling regularly. That's it. So, you know, I went and saw a different GP. You know, I went to. Then I went to a, uh, you know, I went to a special, a women's specialist.

So I thought right, okay, these people are for, um, a women's specialist, you know, so they, so they. You know, it must be on top of this. I presumed must be on top of all this. I just want to make sure that I'm getting onto this early. If I'm already noticing that I'm putting weight on, I don't want to, um, you know, like I, I don't want to continue to put weight on.

Um, I went to this women's specialist and I probably, I left in tears because, you know, I understand being a personal trainer, uh, being in the fitness industry for as long as I have training so many women, I understand my, uh, you know, I understand. My nutrition and my exercise and I just could not, you know, I went to them explaining this and just was saying, I know my book, there's something different going on in my body.

And, uh, you know, and I was dismissed again. And then I was just offered a weight loss drug and I was like, no, I don't, I was actually blown away when I was offered that, but I was like, that's not what I'm looking for. I am, I know there's been a change in my body and I'm just trying to, uh, navigate what is going on here.

And I left in tears and I remember feeling really devastated because I remember thinking if I've left feeling this way and I'm confident about my body, I'm confident, um, I thought, how do other women leave? How do other women leave when they've gone to this doctor? You know, I went to this place because it was recommended by someone else.

I went there because it was a women's specialist. So I presumed that they would, you know, and just to be kind of dismissive being like, well, you're only 40. Um, I felt, I, I really felt, um, I felt like crap when I left and I just felt like hopeless. I felt like there was nothing that could be done enough and I just knew that my body wasn't feeling right.

Um, it was, I felt really frustrated, but yeah, I did feel sad because I thought, gosh, this has made me want to cry. And you know, I, I come across many women who have spent their lives, uh, not being happy with their bodies, dieting, uh, and all of that other stuff. And already not being confident in that way.

And then to be kind of really dismissed by a doctor, I thought, how do those women feel? This is, this is not fair. And I don't want that for anybody. So, um, so that was, uh, that was a bit of my journey. So what I want you to understand is that it's really hard to, Diagnose perimenopause. They are, uh, it's a very under researched area.

It's also hard to diagnose because your hormones are fluctuating, um, daily. Um, you know, so it can be. But what I want you to do is to give you the information. Um, the power and to understand that, you know, your body better than anyone, you know, this doctor that I met for like 15 minutes, you know, she already judged me, uh, what, what bugs me the most is I always get judged because I'm personal trainer.

So they're like, yep, you know, um, I, I get put in a box and you know, you can get put in a box for that way. Uh, and I know there are some GPs that are, um, really, really, uh, different and you know, you know, it's good to find that one that works for you. But what I'm saying is that you take the power, you know, your body better than anybody.

So if you start to notice changes, if you are not feeling right, then let's start to do something about it. And there is so many things that are in your control that you can do, uh, and you can start being prepared for this phase of life that we know, know is coming up. There is so many different myths and all that about menopause.

And, you know, I really urge you to choose who you listen to, you know, choose who you listen to as to how they speak about it. And, you know, also if you're surrounding yourself with people that are speaking about it quite negatively, you're only going to, you're only going to take on that energy. So it's really, you know, like also really important to think about how, how you're viewing it and, uh, you know, who you're surrounding yourself with.

I'm not saying that I know, I know lots of women that really feel like tearing their hair out and that feel terrible and it's really, really hard. You know, I, I, I understand all of those things, but I do think there's Lots of things that you can do and the earlier that you start preparing and getting yourself in those routines, the more likely you're going to be able to stick to it throughout that transition period.

It can feel, obviously the lead up to it can feel daunting. It's something we know is going to happen. Uh, you know, you hear anyone say the dreaded menopause, uh, and I know you can feel like you don't have any control. But I'm going to give you some things that, um, you do have control over. And like I said, it's starting to create habits early in order to, uh, to reduce the symptoms and everyone's different.

Everybody is different. I know my gram, she talks about, she really, really struggled through menopause, um, you know, that she had a really, really rough time where my mom feels like she cruised through it. It's just, it just, you know, we're all unique. And I just think. As more research is coming out there. Um, as times are changing, I think there is so much more that's in your control than what was before.

What would I suggest to start looking at early? I would get yourself into a good exercise routine. So, uh, create your habits of exercise and build onto it. With fluctuating hormones, uh, you know, we, our hormones do fluctuate, but we can start to look at, uh, exercising and moving in a way that works towards us to, to our cycle.

and, um, you know, starting to make sure that you were doing some form of resistance training. So resistance training is using weights. Uh, you're going to do resistance traits and, and do functional movements because as we get older, it is so important to make sure that we're moving well and you're, uh, moving as your body intended.

We are more sedentary than ever. So, um, movement is, um, not. How it used to be and you know, people, um, they underestimate the value of movement. Now, yes, you might feel tired and you might feel lethargic and that you can't move. Be bothered to do it. Um, but the more of a routine that you can get into with your exercise, the better, the better you are going to feel longterm.

I've had, you know, I've been a trainer for over 14 years. I've had so many women they'll start and they'll stop. And you know, then they wish they never, then they realize like, God, I, you know, I wish I never stopped because it was so hard to get started back up or, uh, God, I forgot how good I feel when I move.

And you know, it's fine. Someone. that you can go to that will adapt the exercise to suit you. Uh, the exercise, you know, whether you go to a one on one trainer, whether you go to a group class, any of things, or whether you're, you know, you're happy to do something on your own, but you know, it's, it's, um, look at adapting your exercise to, to your cycle.

This was something that I didn't really value when I was younger, but definitely now, um, I value, um, my energy levels as my cycle. As my cycle goes, yes, I understand in perimenopause, the cycle goes all over and it's unpredictable. Um, but just on the day gauge on how you're feeling. Cause there'll be days that you have more energy than others.

But the other thing is that if you don't do anything, you'll feel crappy for it, but just know that you can move in some way and understand the importance of movement. So movement is not just for weight loss. It's for your mental health. Uh, it can help, um, I don't know anybody that walks out of my classes and says, God, I wish I never did that.

They always leave feeling better for it. Uh, we generally have a laugh, you know, and they can move in a way that's safe for them. Uh, you know, not only for your mental health, but you know, as after 30, if you are not actively working on your muscles, you start to lose them. So you know, when, as you get older, um, you know, your muscle protects your bones, which if you have a fall, uh, you know, if you have a fall, then it's going to prevent them from breaking.

Uh, we do specific exercises to help with your bone density. You know, uh, people that have osteoporosis. or osteopenia, any of those things will exercise is going to help prevent problems. Um, you know, help prevent problems with your bone and bones and help keep them strong. And again, it's exercising safely and according to your fitness level and where you're at.

So, um, and getting yourself in a good exercise routine early means when you're hitting those stages, you've already got that habit in place. So, you know, you're going to know that you can, um, You know, you can know that you can adjust your exercise, you know, and you can adjust accordingly. And the more that you start to guess, understand, you know, uh, your, how it feels towards your cycle, how it feels certain times of month, we can actually start beating ourselves up.

Uh, this week, I know that my, um, Period is due. I know that it's coming up. Um, and I know that I tend to be, um, you know, like this week I'm feeling a little bit flatter. So I'm not pushing myself as much. I'm still exercising and I'm still moving. Um, but I'm not doing as hard workouts as what I could, as what I was doing last week.

That doesn't mean I'm a worse person. That doesn't mean I'm, uh, I'm fitter or hopeless or a bad person, any of those things. It just means I'm listening to my body. And that's what I urge you to start doing. So my first thing was get into a good exercise routine for that exercise is, um, it's honestly going to save your life.

You know, yes, I'm a trainer. It's something I'm very passionate about, but I think keeping active and moving is going to save your life in so many other ways than not doing anything. So it's really, really important. As we go into this new phase of our life, we really want to, um, make sure that we are, you know, you know, keeping a good routine up with our exercise.

Secondly, I would really be looking at your food. Now, I'm not asking anybody to restrict your food or, uh, you know, cut back, you know, or to cut out things or cut back, but I really want you to start looking at food and how it affects your body. Uh, you know, so the main, um, Research is showing that the main, like, symptoms of menopause and, uh, when they're worse can be due to, uh, you know, like it's, um, due to inflammation, so we're looking to reduce inflammation.

So what you'd be looking at is, um, you know, foods that, uh, look at foods that cause high inflammation, you know, alcohol, coffee, um, those types of things, they tend to be more, I'm not saying cut them out, I'm just saying, Look, just start seeing how it feels to your body. Uh, if you are awake at certain times during the night, that can actually be to, to do with digestion.

Uh, so I had a lady that we changed what she was eating at dinner. So she cut out red meat. She cut out red meat and all her hot flushes went away. And, uh, then she, she went back to red meat and they all came back. We're all individual, but it's just looking at, I really truly believe there's so much in our food that we can control.

And it's starting to look at recipes and find recipes that you like and enjoy, and then see how it makes your body feel. Um, you know, we were brought up to, If you're brought up like me, you're brought up thinking that we shouldn't eat any fats. Um, you know, that we shouldn't eat any fats and, you know, it's really, really important.

And most people, fats are important and, uh, they, uh, stop that, you know, that kind of the blood sugar increase. So, you know, it's just looking at how you can, how you can fuel your body. So, uh, to reduce your inflammation and reduce the symptoms. It's what you eat. It is massive and now more than ever, now more than your parents, uh, more than 10 years ago, 20 years ago, our food is more processed than ever and we are busier and we are looking for more fast, quick meals and you know, all of that is having havoc on our body.

So I would look at your food and start creating habits around food and, you know, really looking to find a way that works for you, that you can feel your body. Uh, my next tip would be stress levels. Now, as a society, we are faster pace than what we've ever been. We are more stressed. Then what we do or what people even value stress is just something that is accepted.

And we, um, you know, again, don't realize we have a lot of control over our stress and how we can manage it. Now, again, I know with myself, when I am more stressed, I, um, my period symptoms are worse and my periods are actually worse. So, you know, I'm asking you to look at your stress levels and how you can start managing them.

Uh, again, you know, everybody's different, but like, like I'm saying, this perimenopause phase can start 10 years before you actually reach menopause. Like I said, menopause is only that one day. And then also after that one day that your period stops, you can still. have symptoms for a long time after we're all individual.

So start getting on top of this stuff and stress. Stress is a major one. Um, where it becomes, it depends on, you know, everyone's different, but depends on, you know, I've got people in their sixties that are still having hot flushes and those types of things. I've got people having them in their, you know, in their fifties or their late forties.

So we're, we're all different. Um, you know, for me, I'm, um, My, my, I'm right, I've got two, uh, little kids, you know, so, um, not little, little, but you know, I've got a 10 and a six year old. So my life is quite busy with, uh, sports and activities and school and everything else that they have on. My life is very busy at the moment.

Um, I keep getting, and I enjoy it and I know the busyness of my life is choice. Um, and like, I always get told by people that have their kids are grown up. They're like, you're right in the middle of it all now. And I think learning to manage your stress earlier, uh, you know, and is, is always better. And it's going to make you a better parent, a better partner, a better employee, you know, so.

So, uh, you know, a few years ago I looked at my stress levels and I wrote down, you know, what was kind of stressing me out and then what I could control and what I couldn't control. Uh, I adapted those things and I felt really great. That was a couple of years ago, but you know, then time goes on and more stuff creeps up.

So I've had to learn and adapt again. And that is something that we continually need to be looking at and doing all the time to manage your stress levels. It's something, but it takes, it takes its toll on you more than you know, more than what we realize. Uh, stressing, um, you know, they, they stress is the silent killer.

You know, it is, it is honestly the silent killer. And I know, um, from personal experience, I know, uh, you know, from my, my dad and my husband and seeing them all in, Stress phases in their life, how that really affected their health. You know, it is something that is really underestimated, but. You know, you can, you can really look at how you can change these things.

I have been reassessing my own stress levels lately and I've really been, um, like the other day I had somebody booked in, um, on a Tuesday. I was trying to see my, my grant. I see her on a Tuesday and a Friday and I wanted to go see her and then I wanted to come back and I wanted to make, um, a handstand class that I've been doing.

And I said to the kids, I said, do you think I can make it up to grands, come back, train these people and then go to Hanson and Charlie. So she's six. And she said to me, mum, no, she goes, that's too much. And she was right. Six year old knows better than me. I just wanted to fit it all in. And, uh, so I ended up.

Uh, not going to handstands and when I saw my gram. Assessing and I'm making, uh, making those decisions on what I know is gonna work. Work, you know, and trying to not over commit myself, which I'm very bad at doing. But I'm getting better of it and it's, uh, you know, realizing that this Those things and your stress levels are in your control.

So I would really look at managing your stress and um, putting in a stress management strategies. It's really, really important and it needs to be reassessed. The biggest thing I see for women is they keep their cup empty. So I had a mom saying to me, I'm snapping all the time. I don't know what's going on with me.

And you know, it's really easy to say, well, that's menopause that start blaming that. You know, but the thing is, it's just that your cup is empty. So it's the same thing. Managing your stress is keeping your cup full. Give me your cup full. Doesn't make you selfish. It makes you a good, um, a good person because you're looking after you.

And the same thing, when you're looking after you, you're better for your children, you know, all the people around you. So keep, work out what are those things that keep your cup full. When this person, we'd spoken about it, she realized like she was no longer going to book club and she was, you know, she was no longer doing this and she had an out of stress of a sick mom.

So, you know, so we've got so much other things going on, um, that it is really, really important. And we always think, Oh, I'll be okay. I'll be okay. And Yeah, you will be okay, but the other thing is it starts to take its toll on your body, and therefore your symptoms, uh, the, how, um, menopause appears to you.

If you are more stressed, you know, it's, it's more likely going to have a different, you know, a, a, um, worse effect on your body. So there are things you can do to manage that. And lastly, look at your sleep. So these are all things that are in your control. is I really underestimated how Beneficial. It is lots.

I see lots of women say, oh, I can only last on a few hours sleep, and I'm sure you can, and so can I, but I feel a thousand times better when I get, you know, a good seven to eight hours sleep a night. Uh, I also understand how, uh, lots of women, uh, is, you know, we just want that little bit of time on our own at nighttime, you know, time away from the kids, or time just, you know, away from anything just to switch off.

And so we may end up staying up later. But it's just really thinking about that, that staying up later, how does that affect the rest of your day? So that extra one or two hours at night, you know, is it worth feeling crappy for those 16 hours during the day? When we are more tired, we tend to make poorer, uh, decisions, uh, with food.

Uh, we feel less motivated to exercise, um, you know, and it really does take, it's take its toll. When you are sleeping is when your body repairs, it's when your body, uh, you know, like if you are exercising and you're trying to eat all the right things, but then you're not getting very much sleep. You know, it, it, it will take its toll.

Symptoms of, uh, perimenopause and all that, uh, do affect your sleep. So trying to, uh, helping you, you know, have a good sleep routine, um, find the things that help you sleep better. So for me, if I do, uh, Restorative like yoga or those things before bed. I get a better sleep if I, you know, switch the iPad off.

I worked out if I wear those blue screen glasses that take out the light, and I know you can do that on your iPad too. I like to watch something in bed that helps me switch off. If I wore them, I noticed on my watch the sleep quality was better. It's all different, but it's having that routine that helps you wind down.

I know lots of people have baths and you know, it's, it's really helping you in that way to get a better night's sleep. And, uh, you know, prioritize sleep. I also made a change in my morning. Instead of getting up early, I exercise in the afternoon, uh, getting up earlier to exercise. I'm prioritizing having a bit of a longer sleep and that has been good for my body too, but we're all unique.

So prioritize your sleep. And I said that was my last one, but I forgot. So the last thing is community. Uh, one of the biggest things for aging, any of those things, is to have a community of people around you, uh, you know, that can help support you and not make you feel alone. It's been a very fast paced, society at the moment and so many different things going on.

Uh, you know, this, this research just shows that we don't laugh as much, which I think is really, really sad. So the fact of having a good laugh and, you know, just unwinding and, you know, unwinding can mean having a glass of wine and, you know, those types of things. So it's like having that community around you.

And having those laughs and having those people that you can talk to and bounce off, uh, they are the best things. Um, I listened to a podcast, uh, probably a year or so ago, and I loved it. And this lady was in her eighties. And, um, the biggest thing she said for keeping her young was, um, having people around her.

in the community. She was all part of different groups and she was really active and moving around. And I thought that's what I want to be. I want to be, um, doing things and keeping myself around people to, to help keep you young and feeling needed and, and all of that. So keep you put yourself in a community of people that are like you and, um, you know, so then you don't feel alone and isolated.

Um, because again, feeling that way can make all of those, um, symptoms worse for you. Now please understand, let's not start dreading menopause. Let's not talk about it negatively. Let's understand that it is something that, um, it happens to all of, uh, all women. It is a natural part of life. It is meant to happen.

It's our process. Um, but you know, it doesn't have to be seen as a negative, horrible thing. It can be seen as a whole new you. We're in a different phase of our lives. We are more mature. We are wiser. More confident in ourselves. And Let's lead into that lifestyle feeling that way. So, you know, look at the things that you can actually take charge of and start the sooner that you can get these habits and build these habits, the sooner you can get into, the sooner you can start creating them, the better for you.

So start thinking about those things now. And, um, you know, get on, get on top of it. Don't just wait or dread it happening because when you already have all those routines in place, I guarantee you, it will be a lot easier. smoother than what it would be if you didn't have any of those routines in place.

Um, so I'm going to love use and leave use today. And if you want any help with this, please make sure that you message me. We actually have a new program, which is, um, being launched soon, which is all about learning to balance and manage um, menopause to help guide you. It has recipe packs, uh, and lots of good stuff.

It's a four week program. So, um, start looking out for that. And if you want more information on that, please send me a message and I will share it with you. Uh, I love you's and leave you's. Have a great day.